The Exodus
by n00dles4lifee
Summary: We all know how Bella felt when Edward left, but how did Edward feel? A one shot of Edward's leaving in his POV.


**Okay so I started this at like 1:45ish and finished it at 4:10A.M....so I was part crazy when I wrote this. Well I wanted to get feedback on this and wanted to know how cheesy this sounded to you...be honest I don't want you to lie even if you have nothing nice to say about it. Just tell me what you think! I tried to sum this up better but we all know Edward over analyzes everything. Enjoy I guess. **

**just so no one is confused...this is Edward's leaving in his POV.  
**

I walked my angel towards the edge of the woods by her house, thinking about how to break the news to her that would break my heart. She seemed curious that I would want to go on a walk now, considering that it looked as though it was about to rain any second. I came to a slow stop in front of a fringe of trees, before it the woods became more dense, if you looked straight in the opposite direction you could still see Bella's house. I was afraid she would get lost if I led her too far into the woods. I turned back to my angel, her eyes danced with pure curiosity at my sudden decision to take a walk.

"Okay, let's talk." She said. I could hear the underlying worry hidden in her voice. I knew I would forever regret the words that I was about the speak next.

"Bella, we're leaving." I said simply. Trying to keep the pain from leaking into my voice. I could see the confusion sweep across my angel's beautiful features.

"Why now? Another year-" she began. I cut her off before she could finish her sentence that would probably send me over the edge.

"Bella, it's time. How much longer could we stay in Forks, after all? Carlisle can barely pass for thirty, and he's claiming thirty-three now. We'd have to start over soon regardless." I said repeating the lines I had practiced over and over in my head trying to make them sound as though I truly meant them. I could see another round of confusion sweep across Bella's beautiful face, as she tried to understand what I was getting to.

"When you say _we_-" I cut her off again trying to hold myself together.

"I mean my family and myself." my words sounded separated and distinct as I tried to keep myself from dropping to my knees begging for forgiveness, claiming this all was a dare from a stupid game Emmett had come up with, but I pushed the thought from my mind knowing that this was the only way that I could keep my angel safe from monsters like myself. Realization seemed to hit my sweet angel like a train wreck speeding down the tracks, by the way all hope completely dissipated from her face. I watched my angel shake her head back and forth, a moment that seemed like a lifetime for my kind, she spoke again.

"Okay, I'll come with you." her statement came to me as a shock. I knew she would insist on coming with us, but I did not think she would have given in so easily without even thinking about her family or her life she would ultimately leave behind in the end.

"You can't, Bella. Where we're going...It's not the right place for you." I said trying to sound as though I did not feel as though I was tearing a non-existent soul from my body with every word that left my cold lips.

"Where you are is the right place for me." she replied. I was afraid that my angel would have made this hard for me, I knew that this wouldn't be easy but I a part of me still wished that in some way she would understand that I was a danger to her and that she would let me go with only a parting good bye, but I should know it could never be that simple.

"I'm no good for you, Bella." I tried to reason with her, even though I knew it was useless, she was the most stubborn human I had ever met and that was only one of the traits that I knew I would miss so dearly about my angel.

"Don't be ridiculous." Bella pleaded with me, it sounded as though there was a hint of anger mixed into her tone. "You're the very best part of my life." I could not get over just how wrong my angel had it when she said that _I_ was the best part of her life. There was no way that I could have come even relatively close to the best thing in her life. I was a horrible monster, a killer, a demon in the midst of an angel. Here I was ripping out the heart of the very angel I claimed to love. How could I ever claim to love such a beautiful creature? I shouldn't even be allowed in her presence much less be allowed to love her.

"My world is not for you." I said. My voice coming out grimly.

"What happened with Jasper- that was nothing, Edward! Nothing!" Bella began to raise her voice the slightest bit.

"You're right," I agreed. I almost winced at the memory, how close Bella had come to becoming Jasper's dinner. "It was exactly what was to be expected." I said, my every word coming out as truth. Jasper's reaction was exactly what was to be expected. However no one had expected Bella's paper cut or Jasper to react as quickly as he did. Jasper had felt horrible for what he had done. Alice had been holding him all night trying to keep him from fleeing back to the south or going to the Denali coven, out of his sheer guilt.

"You promised! In Phoenix, you promised that you would stay-"

"As long as that was best for you." I cut her off again remembering exactly what I said to her, how could I forget anything that happened when we were in Phoenix. It was only another time that Bella, my angel had been pulled into hell, only for what I was, a demon in the midst of a angel.

"_No!_ This is about my soul again isn't it?" My angel shouted at me, although it sounded like a plea I could see that this was hurting her. All that I could think now is what Carlisle had once told me long ago 'human memories always fade'. "Carlisle told me about that, and I don't care, Edward. I don't care! You can have my soul. I don't want it without you- it's yours already!" She finished. I took a deep breath trying to hold myself together. How could she not want her soul without a killer like me? I wondered for the slightest second how she would take this if I went for Emmett's dare option, I quickly wiped that option from my mind I couldn't keep endangering her life. If I loved her I would just leave her and never come back. She could have a normal life and have a family. I looked up at my angel trying to imagine her in a normal life without me. The thought itself tore a hole straight through my dead, unbeating heart. I had really hoped it would not come to this. I didn't know if I could even handle what I was about to tell my angel myself.

"Bella, I don't want you to come with me." I tried to speak the words carefully as I possibly could without breaking down into dry sobs and begging for forgiveness at the feet of my angel. I couldn't turn away from her beautiful face as her mind began to process the awful lies I had told her. She paused for what seemed like an eternity.

"You...don't...want me?"

"No." She stared into my eyes. It seemed that she was waiting for an apology that I knew I could never give her, and that pained me enough just to look back into her eyes and see the brown pools that I would loose all rational thought in as sad as they looked now.

"Well, that changes things." I had to keep myself from gasping at how calm and reasonable her voice sounded. She seemed numb, like she didn't feel anything anymore. I couldn't look into her saddened eyes anymore, I pulled my eyes from hers and into the treetops.

"Of course I'll always love you...in a way." I said trying to let her know that I would always love her and I could never stop loving her. "But what happened the other night," I continued "Made me realize that it's time for a change. Because I'm...tired of pretending to be something I'm not, Bella. I am not human. I've let this go on much too long, and I'm sorry for that." I looked at my angel wishing with all my might that I could take back everything I had said before and just hold her in my arms once more.

"Don't" My angel whispered to me. I watched as awareness leaked into her eyes as she realized it was too late. "Don't do this." She finished anyway.

"You're not good for me Bella." I said turning my earlier words around so that she would have no argument. She opened her mouth as though she was preparing to say something, but then closed it. I tried to keep my face clear of all emotion as I stared at my one true love.

"If...that's what you want." she said slowly. I couldn't trust myself to talk without breaking down into dry sobs, so I only nodded.

"I would like to ask one favor, though, if that's not to much. I said glancing down thinking of only how much danger Bella could get into while I was away.

"Anything." She answered quickly.

"Don't do anything reckless or stupid." I ordered. "Do you understand what I'm saying?" I looked her in the eye. I was only wishing she would be safe. I knew it was unlikely considering that Bella was my personal danger-magnet. As I looked into her eyes I noticed a hint hope dancing. "I'm thinking of Charlie, of course. He needs you. Take care of yourself- for him." although I wanted her to think that I still loved her and wanted her to be by my side the rest of eternity, I couldn't let her know that. She nodded.

"I will."she whispered. I relaxed slightly at her words.

"And I can make a you promise in return." I continued saying the words I dreaded to say the most. "I promise this will be the last time you'll see me. I won't come back. I won't put you through anything like this again. You can go on with your life with out anymore interference from me. It will be as if I'd never existed." I said those words as another tear ripped straight through me. I could hear my angel's heart beat excel and her blood pulse to her head. I took comfort in what Carlisle told me and hopefully she would too. I tried my best to smile my crooked grin at her that I knew she had fallen in love with. It came out as a small smile, "Don't worry. You're human- your memory is no more than a sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind." I walked away from my angel that day...never again to be a demon in the midst of an angel.

_**THE END**_

_**I hope you liked it! **_

_**just tell me what you think.  
**_


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